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A Change of Heart [05.24.2008 ; 12.53 pm]
The Astronomy Tower


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[feeling |coldcold]

Title: A Change of Heart
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance/Angst
Characters/Pairings: Lily/James, Remus, Sirius
Summary: Lily has a bit of a change of heart, and a simple conversation changes her relationship with James forever.
Word Count: 1255
Note: Um, okay, this was actually written back in 2005. So yes, it is really old. I was working on cleaning off my ff.net account, though, so I wanted to save it here. *shrugs*

She looked so… sad. That really was the only way to put it. Her red hair was blowing in her face, covering her pained, green eyes. He sighed as he quietly watched, but he couldn’t stop looking at her – attracted by her beauty and perplexed by her sadness, but worried out of love.</p>

“You okay, Prongs?” cut the voice of Sirius Black. James looked away from the window, noticing that his friends were watching him.

“Yeah,” he nodded, returning to his essay, though he had no desire to work on it. He glanced out the window again, wondering what exactly Lily Evans was doing. Maybe, he thought, she’s praying for her mum and dad.

Mr. and Mrs. Evans had died in a car crash just before the summer holidays had ended. It broke Lily’s heart. But what broke Lily’s heart even more was that her sister, Petunia, blamed Lily for their deaths. She hadn’t blamed the driver of the car that had hit that of the non-expecting Evans, but Lily, for simply being… Lily.

“What are you looking at?” Sirius burst out, getting up and moving around the table to look out the window. James turned to look at Sirius, who said, “Oh…”

Remus also moved to look out the window. He quietly commented, “I’ve been worrying about her lately.” Lily and he were sort of friends, but it was simply Remus’s caring nature that made him concerned for the redhead.

“Why?” Sirius asked. “What’s wrong with her?”

“Well,” James said shortly, “maybe it’s the fact that her parents just died.”

Sirius blushed slightly, a little embarrassed for completely forgetting that he wasn’t the only person with problems (as usual). “Right,” he muttered.

James stood up, unable to take Sirius and his stupid questions.

“Prongs,” Sirius said, looking at him. “Where are you going?”

James ignored him, picking up his parka and leaving through the portrait hole.

“What’s his problem?” Sirius asked agitatedly, turning back to his essay again.

“Just let him be,” Remus muttered, pulling the curtain back to cover the window again and collecting his books, quill, and parchment before ascending the stairs to the boys’ dormitory.

James walked outside the castle doors, his hands burrowed in his pockets. He felt vaguely guilty for just walking out on his friends like that, but they deserved it. Especially Sirius.

James slowed his pace dramatically, the icy wind sending shivers down his spine. He looked at Lily, who he was slowly approaching. He involuntarily shuddered, though he wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or the sight of her.

“Lily?” He said cautiously, about a meter or two away from her.

Lily quickly wiped her eyes, and then turned around, looking at James. She smiled slightly, despite the fact that her eyes were red from crying. “Hey James,” she said, her voice breaking slightly.

James only had a moment to note that she had actually used his first name. He loved the way she said his name. He thought it was so smooth and beautiful, like singing.

James carefully approached her. As he stood, he bounced on the balls of his feet, unsure of what to say to her; he had stopped asking her out since sixth year, and now found conversation with her quite difficult. He decided to start easy. “Er… what’s up?”

Lily shrugged.

“Well… I mean… were you thinking about your parents?” he asked cautiously.

Lily looked at him for a moment, thinking over her response. Then she turned back, again, looking at the lake. “Yeah,” she said softly. After a pause, she continued, “You know, you’re the first person who’s actually asked about them.”

“Oh,” James said. “I’m sorry, if you don’t want to talk about it – ”

“Oh, no!” Lily added, suddenly. “I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just… you’re the only one who’s cared enough to ask.”

James was about to smile, proud of himself, but remembered the situation and stopped himself.

“People think I shouldn’t think or talk about it. They think they know what’s best for me,” Lily continued.

“Well,” James smiled, trying to lighten the situation and cheer Lily up, “apparently, I did.”

A smile played at her lips. “Who would have ever expected you, of all people?” she inquired teasingly.

“Hey!” James cried in mock offense. “You know, I’m not always that stupid. It’s just when I try to be.”

Lily couldn’t help herself – she began laughing, ever so slightly. She was so beautiful when she laughed. God, he loved her. Their eyes locked, and James noticed the way the breath caught in Lily’s chest – the same happened to him. And then, before he could stop himself, he leaned in towards her, pressing his lips against hers. Her lips tasted like cherries, probably from the cherry lip balm he always watched her apply. After a moment, she pulled away, her eyes fluttering open.

James suddenly realized what he had done. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, his eyes wide. “I just… I should go.” He turned to leave.

“Wait!” Lily said, and James turned back around. “I… I think that I should have an opinion on that matter.”

James raised one of his eyebrows, looking at the redhead. “And… what would that be?” he queried.

“I want you to stay,” Lily breathed. “Please, stay.”

“What?” James inquired, not expecting her answer.

“I want you to stay,” she repeated, taking hold of one of his hands. “You’ve been so kind to me. And not just tonight – over the past months, you’ve been giving me space while other people think that I need to be surrounded by friends to keep my mind off everything. Truthfully, all I wanted was to be left alone, to be given time to think. Not only that, but you’ve… well, you’ve changed. Since the beginning of the year, you’ve been treating me more like a person and less like some prize to be won. And the truth is,” she blushed slightly, “I’ve found myself liking you more and more, perhaps… even more than as a friend.”

James blinked, not believing what he was hearing. He had dreamed about the day when Lily would confess things like this, but he had, truthfully, never expected it.

“What I mean,” Lily continued, “is that I really misjudged you. I thought you were a prat, but you’ve changed. Now, you’re just this really sweet guy who I think I might be falling for.”

James’s heart was exploding with emotion – he simply couldn’t believe it. Lily, the love of his life, was admitting that she loved him, too! He kissed her again, once more tasting cherries and breathing in the floral scent of her red hair, falling around her shoulders. He found Lily placing a cold hand on his cheek, and he gently put his hand on her lower back, their other hands still with fingers tangled together. Their kiss was everything he ever dreamed it to be.

When he released her, he smiled slightly at her. “Are you sure?” he questioned softly.

Lily nodded. James pulled her into a hug. “I’m glad you want me to stay, you know, because,” he whispered in her ear, “I love you.”